7 things I wish I knew when I graduated college [and when I struggled to figure out my career path]
Recently I spoke at DePaul University to a group of soon-to-be graduating students about embracing their next step. Although I have been an adjunct professor before, it had been awhile since I spoke directly to college students. I felt called to reflect on my own experience and the lessons I've learned since I've graduated myself...many years ago ;)
Thinking back to being 22, I remember feeling so anxious and scared about the next step. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my career, but I felt shame as I was incessantly asked, "what are you doing next?" I truly had no idea what I wanted my entire career to look like. Was I supposed to know and pretend like I had it all figured out? I felt lost, and I didn't have someone telling me that I I was going to be okay.
Which leads me to explaining why I called my presentation "Embracing Your Next Step". I think so many college students feel overwhelmed because they are told they have to choose their entire career at 22 and it's written in stone. I wanted to change the discourse around this so that the students understood that it was just one choice, one step, that they were taking.
It quickly deescalates the stress and fear when you realize that choosing what you do after college is just one of the many choices you will make in life. We all have many choices and chapters, and the post-college decision is definitely our first BIG decision we make.
Life is so unpredictable and it can change at any moment. As Western humans we have been socialized into thinking we can control more than we actually can. I wanted to reassure these students that they are in a beautiful time of their lives where they can make a choice based around joy and fun, rather than fear and scarcity. My goal was to help them see that no matter what they do next, they will all be okay. That I understood their fears and empathized with their feelings.
The discussion involved the students visioning their futures with a silent mediation (heck, yes!), recognizing their strengths, and learning how to managing fear and pressure from their families and society. We had an amazing, interactive discussion and they all willingly shared their ideas, hopes, and dreams. I was so impressed by their self-awareness and vulnerability.
But since it was May of their Spring semester (okay...clearly I remember senioritis well), I knew they only had limited space to remember anything I was saying. So before we ended the lecture, I wanted to leave them with 7 pieces of powerful advice that I wish I knew when I graduated. Read below to learn what they are ----->
7 things I wish I knew when I graduated college (and for anyone who is adulting or struggling to find a career they love)
1. Learn to master yourself.
Spend as much time as you can learning who you are and what you want out of your life. For 22 years of our lives, most of us listen to our parents, our teachers, and follow the structure that has been set up for us. We don't focus on personal growth or personal mastery. Once you graduate, if you can begin to develop a relationship with your Self, this will serve you in your career, relationships, and beyond. This will be your greatest superpower and asset, knowing who you are. And while you're at it, define what "success" means to you and stick to your definition, not anyone else's.
2. You don't need to know what you want to do with your life today.
All your doing next is choosing your next step, not the next 30 years. Really, you have no idea where your path will lead or what will be thrown at you. This is a big lie we tell ourselves, that successful people know what they want early on. I personally find that some of the most interesting people have non-linear paths and never really knew what they wanted to do either. You don't need to know all of the answers today. Clarity comes from action.
3. Network your heart out.
It's true, it's not what you know, it's who you know. You never know who will introduce you to a future boss. If I could go back in time I would have networked harder and earlier. Introduce yourself and befriend people at your company. As an introvert, I've always struggled with this and it wasn't until later in my 20's that I realized how important this was. Have coffee dates. Attend interesting networking events. Be genuine and you will realize how most people want to help. Especially if you're a college student, people want to offer guidance. If you're further out, people still respond well if you are real and kind.
4. Be comfortable with taking risks and making mistakes.
You will fail and make mistakes. This is a fact in life! Failing builds characters. Growth comes from pain. If you aren't failing, you aren't taking enough risks. The younger you are, you can realistically take more risks. Take advantage of your time, be a calculated risk taker, and find the courage to make the decisions that you really want. If you don't see a career you like right now, you may have to create it. Don't be afraid to think outside the box.
5. Don't take things personally.
You will hear the word "no" more than you will hear "yes". The quicker you can learn to brush off rejection, the better off you will be. Rejection is never personal (unless someone is a jerk and you really don't want to work with them anyways) and it's usually a great sign that you weren't supposed to take that particularly road or path at that time. Anytime a door closes, move on with your head high. There are so many other opportunities out there. Learn your lessons and move on without resentment.
6. Be patient. Dream jobs take time.
Right now if you're new in the working world you really have no idea what you like or dislike. If you're starting over in a new career, you also have to accept that you are at the "bottom" of the totem pole. You must learn what you like and don't like, work a job that you hate, and learn from all of your experiences before you will even know what your dream job is. You have unique talents and skills and the only way to discover what they are is to take the next step. I emphasize trial and error here. There are no wrong decisions or paths, it all becomes unique to your story and your journey. Be curious and stay patient.
7. Learn how to budget. And do it yesterday.
This was the bonus tip in my lecture. Budgeting is critical for all socioeconomic levels and it's not something we really learn in school. Unless you have been taught by someone or have done it out of survival or necessity, many college graduates do not have a handle on their finances or what the real world looks like. For one, I recognize my privilege in inspiring people to overcome their fear and go after a career they love. I recognize the privilege it takes to have the freedom to do work that you truly love. Many people can't and simply have to work to pay bills and support their families. Many college students will graduate with an enormous amount of student loans and finding a dream job is so off their radar. So that's why I stress the importance of budgeting at a young age, living under your means, and working towards a career that may be unavailable today. It's impossible to search for a dream job or a career you love when you have to take care of financial priorities first. However, if you budget intelligently early on in life, you can make the transition one day into a field that fuels your passion.
Thoughts? Questions? Comments? Any tips you would add to my list? Would love to hear what you think.
Thinking of working with a career coach? If you would like to explore this path for yourself, please schedule a complimentary call with me to determine if we're a good fit together. Schedule your call here.
xx
Amanda